In the Family Way (sort of)

About 6 months ago, my eldest sister dropped a bit of a bombshell on the family. After months of soul-searching, research, prayer and thought, my single 40-something sister had decided to pursue international adoption.

The ensuing months have been a roller-coaster of emotions as she prepares for the day when she is able to bring home my new nephew (or, less likely, niece). She’s had to complete dozens of forms, take parenting classes, get fingerprinted multiple times (3 times, 2 methods, all going to the FBI), and decide on a country, age of child, and countless other decisions. I knew it would be an involved situation, I didn’t know how thorough the process would be though!

Along the way, the adoption agency she had been working with ran into a licensing bump, leading to more thought and agony. As a result of talking to Denise, and being a shoulder to cry on, I’ve spent way too much time looking at adoption websites since July (and not enough on my homework). We’ve researched Kazakhstan and Columbia (thanks, CIA World Factbook), checked out Polish adoption laws, and now, we are looking into Vietnam. Along the way, I’ve found dozens of websites for adoption agencies, countless blogs, and some truly inspiring people.

Of course, reading the blogs of families who are in country to pick up their children has been both delightful (lovely child, happy smiles, hugs) and heartbreaking (when families arrive to discover that the child they were assured was healthy is severely special needs, and the family doesn’t have the financial or emotional resources to complete the adoption).

I’ve discovered there are heritage camps, so that international children can learn about their birth country’s culture, and I’ve decided I miss going to the camps of my childhood.

This post really isn’t about any specific site. It’s more to serve as a caution to anyone seeking to adopt – please, do your research, plan thoroughly, and do some more research. Seek out every available resource you can, both in print and online, as well as the people around you. My sister is six months in, and it could be another 1-2 years before she brings a child home. This is a much longer gestational period than any of our family ever imagined.

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